Archive for November, 2011

Sir Desmond Speaks Unto the Nation

November 24, 2011

My words of wisdom have found a new home

Listen and learn

Hear my words of wisdoms!

November 22, 2011

You lucky things!

To hear my podcast – and yes, I know that’s not a real word – click here

More news to whet your appetite!

November 17, 2011

I am worried what this news will do you you all, what this tiresome modern preoccupation with ‘health & safety (if we’d had that nonsense during the war, heaven knows where we’d be – sued by the Nazis for hurt feelings…)

Anyway, have a look here

Try to keep calm, for goodness sake! I realise it’s the most exciting news you’ve heard all year – probably all decade if you live in Middlesbrough).

Just put December 1st in your diary (not dairy, not unless you need more milk for your Christmas guests – and yes I say Christmas, not ‘winterval’).

And keep your eyes peeled for the next step – a free podcast!

(No, I have no idea what one is either, and I refuse to believe it’s even a proper word, but these youngsters today with their technology, drug-addled brains and inexplicably under-developed arses which they insist on showing off by not pulling up their trousers…)

Exciting news, fans!

November 9, 2011

You are all going to feel frightfully privileged with the news I am about to impart!

I have had many request over the years to reveal my ‘tricks of the trade,’ to demonstrate how I go about creating my beloved books. And I’ve always said no. But as I reach this ripe old age, I think it is a crying shame that my working practices aren’t revealed to the world, not just for those alive now, but for future generations who wish to understand how some of the best-selling books the 20th century has seen were created.

So when I started work on my most recent novel The Devil take Your Stereo, I decided to ‘go public’ as it were. My loyal fans, all several millions of you, know that I dictate my words onto a recording device. These words are then transcribed by my secretary Cilla. I know many of my fellow scribes do their own writing, but I was brought up to believe that typing is women’s work.

Anyway, the recording I made for The Devil take Your Stereo will be released on some sort of gramophonic system for your delectation and education. Yes, it will be warts and all. Some of you may be shocked – writing can be hard bloody work, and my language can be fruity! But as an insight into the working practices of a major author, it will be quite eye-opening. You will be transfixed, I can assure you.

A date for release hasn’t been fixed yet, but I will keep you informed.

There will also be info on my Facebook page – whatever that is.

You can also read my thoughts on Twitter @sirdesstirling. No, I havent’ a clue either…